Yikes, 0nce Halloween is over,we're officially in the Holiday Season.
That strikes fear in many of our hearts.
The frantic-ness of events, shopping and kids' performances need to fit into an already full schedule.
What if you did it differently this year? What if your holidays were about gratitude and service? My all-time favorite holiday is Thanksgiving.
Can you imagine...
a holiday dedicated to thankfulness.
The road to "enough," "satisfaction" and "sufficiency" is paved with gratitude.
If we aren't grateful for what we have, how could we possibly be grateful for more? I have a magnet on my refrigerator that says: To have more, desire less.
I'm not talking about doing without.
I'm not suggesting that you give up those things that bring the most intrinsic value to your life.
What I am suggesting is that many of the ways we spend money are habit, about status or keeping up, or are driven by other-than-gratitude motivations.
Have you ever bought something just to have it? You might want to think about the emptiness of that strategy.
To acquire something just to have it, without it fulfilling some truly meaningful value in your life, is an endless road.
There is no satisfaction at the end of that road because the choice isn't grounded in value.
Intrinsic values are things like feeling closer to a loved one, sharing a special moment, healing an injury, adding something to your lifestyle that brings passion and joy, giving to others that have less than you, being of service.
They are the kinds of things that if you knew you only had a week to live, you would want to make sure you've done them in your last week on earth.
Everything else pales in comparison.
A few of my clients have been triathletes, competing across the country, good weather and bad.
They train for months, and get satisfaction out of the contest without needing to win.
It satisfies a passion, and brings them accomplishment.
Some of my clients are musicians, and getting a gig is heaven to them.
Being able to play their instrument is a driving force.
Many of them have other jobs, and do their music in their spare hours just for the joy of it.
What if you could spend fewer hours away from home, creating the dollars that you use to buy your lifestyle if you made other choices? Would that give you more time for your passion? For your family? For being of service to others? What currently unmet intrinsic needs could be filled by not having to make as much money? In this month that celebrates gratitude, we're given achance to be with family (or family of choice) and review these kinds of questions.
I don't think the grasp for materialism in this country has taken us where we wanted to go.
We have less spare time than most industrial nations, and lower savings percentages.
If you don't think about this now, then when? If you don't make changes now, what will your life be like in five years? What is it costing you in intrinsic value for you to continue on as you are? NEXT STEPS:

1. Make a gratitude list each night for seven nights.
   Not the same list over and over, necessarily, but what you are most grateful for that night.
   Sit with it for five minutes, even if you have to set a timer.
   
2. Have a conversation with your loved ones about intrinsic values.
   What are the most important values that you want in your life? How does your spending align with those values? Make a list of changes you might want to make to integrate those values.
   
3. Think differently.
   Instead of gifts this year, consider having the adults exchange donations.
   Or exchange service-related activities that you've done with your recipient in mind.
   If your sister is a cancer survivor, you could donate your time or money to cancer research for instance.
   Nothing teaches gratitude faster than working with those less fortunate than you, like at a soup kitchen or serving Thanksgiving dinner at a shelter.
   

This year, make a decision to have this Holiday, all your future holidays, and the years to come be less stressful and more financially satisfying.
Don't wait and look back in January on yet another pile of holiday bills.