I have just completed Eben Pagan's "Connected: How to Gain Access to Anyone & Build a Powerful, Profitable Business Network".
As I progressed through the program I suddenly got this epiphany when he spoke about tribes.
One thing he said, that really caught my attention, was that we all belong to certain tribes and we take our cues from that tribe.
Our thought process, actions and activities are all somehow related to our tribe.
Therefore, as an outsider wanting to connect with a certain individual or tribe, it is incumbent upon us to understand the culture and thinking process of the tribe or individual we wish to connect with.
To illustrate this point better, he told an interesting story of an encounter he had with a security officer at Chicago Airport.
He said as the officer was scanning his bag, she noticed his computer cables in his bag.
She remarked loudly "if people could stop placing cables in their bags it would make our lives so much easier".
He said he did not take offence to what she said but the manner in which she said it.
She spoke out so loud that everyone in the queue could hear her.
Instead of letting it pass, he decided to confront her, but the officer responded that she was not speaking about his bag.
He said to "her lady you are scanning my bag and I have cables in my bag and you said you were not speaking about me?" She insisted that she was not speaking about him.
He decided to escalate the issue and requested to speak to a manager.
When the manager arrived, he basically repeated the same thing the officer had told him.
He tried getting the manager to reason with him to no avail.
In the end he left thinking to himself, there was no way he was going to get through to the manager, they are all the same.
For him it was a very important life lesson.
He now realised that different tribes have their own way of thinking and if you wanted to interact with members of that tribe you needed to be able to connect to them using the language they understand.
This information might sound elementary for many people, but trust me on this one, the inability to put this basic information into practice is why most businesses are struggling.
This is especially true for professional entrepreneurs such as doctors, lawyers, accountants, dentists or consultants.
We always feel that our logical brain will get us through.
If there is one lesson we need to take from this it's that human relationships matter a lot.
In business, having the expertise is good, having a good system is great and having a good marketing strategy is excellent.
However, as an entrepreneur if you lack the ability to forge meaningful human relationships, you will continue to struggle.
Bill Gates' biggest asset is his ability to form alliances with other businesses.
Checkout the most successful businesses: Apple, McDonald's, The Hilton Hotel Group, they are all in bed with one another which is the reason why they continue to move from success to success.
To quote Jeffery Gitomer "all things being equal, people want to do business with their friends.
All things being not so equal, people still want to do business with their friends".
Relationships are critical to business success.
However, to be able to forge a profitable business relationship with anyone from another tribe, you first need to understand the culture of that tribe.
Remember business success is not solely reliant on good customer service and good product knowledge; it is both of these elements combined with good relationships...
Good Customer Service + Good Product Knowledge + Good Business Relationships = Business Success