Would you commit a few minutes every day for 90 days to have a better marriage? We plan vacations, we make plans for our children, we plan for our retirement.
But we often fail to make plans for our marriage.
When the marriage falls apart and you end up in a divorce court, most of the other plans you have made will quickly lose their value.
A good marriage takes dedication and work.
After counseling with many couples I have discovered a few basic rules that will help you to have a prosperous marriage.
It is often said that it takes 90 days to form a new habit.
If you will make a list of these suggestions and consciously put them into use a few minutes every day, I believe you will see a great improvement in your relationship with your spouse.
Desire - Do you remember the strong desire you had to be with you mate before you got married? You could hardly wait to be with them.
You often phoned them several times a day.
Don't let that desire die.
Let your desire for a good relationship with your husband or wife, be a burning desire.
Commitment - Many marriages end in failure because there is no commitment.
When problems arise in the marriage many people want to walk away, and not face the issues.
When you said your wedding vows, you committed to love each other until 'death do us part'.
Renew that commitment each day.
Communications - You must learn how to talk with each other, not to each other.
Listen, and understand what is being said.
Learn the difference in how a man and a woman thinks.
That difference is there to compliment each other.
Don't fight it.
Use it to your advantage and it will strengthen your marriage.
Forgiveness - The saying that love covers a multitude of sins is even more important in a marriage.
We all speak before we think sometime.
Feelings get hurt.
We do dumb, stupid things without thinking at times.
Learn to quickly forgive and forget.
Forgive without being ask.
Never go to sleep with unsettled issues between you.
If you can't reach an agreement, at least be agreeable and set a later time to resolve the problem.
Money - Money problems is listed in the top three causes of divorce, followed my sexual problems and in-law problems.
You must have a budget! Live within your means.
Always have a clear understanding with your partner about money issues.
One should be in charge of the finances.
Both of you should agree to some rules about finances,and STICK TO THEM! If you need financial guidance, many community groups and churches offer free classes on money management.
Sex - Sex should be a very important and beautiful part of a marriage.
Often, it causes frustration and disappointment.
The best rule I know of is found in the Bible.
You are not to withhold sexual desires from each other except it be with consent.
The husbands roll is to see that the wife's sexual needs and desire for love and security comes first before his needs.
The wife should do all she knows how to do to see that her husbands sexual needs are met.
In-laws - Your spouse should be first in your life.
Don't let parents, children, family, friends...
anything come between you.
When your parents visit you, they are a guest in your home.
They should abide by the house rules just like everyone else.
They should not interfere with your business, the way your raise your children, or any of your affairs unless you ask them for advice or help.
You love them and treat them with compassion and respect.
Just don't let them come between you and your spouse.
If you will take just a few minutes each day to consciously work on the suggestions, it won't be long before you will see a stronger, more loving relationship in your marriage.