As someone with deep southern roots, I was taught manners and etiquette at a very early age. My parents told me the rules, repeated the rules, and enforced the rules by any means necessary. I didn't dare veer from what they taught, or … Hmm. I'm not sure what would have happened. But let's just say I was afraid of the consequences.

There are still some things that must be said, but we have to be cautious about how we word them, so our southern ancestors came up up with some sayings to get our point across without appearing blatantly tacky.

I've seen a lot of people with curious looks on their faces during a conversation with a southerner, so I thought it might help to provide a list that deciphers some of these cryptic comments.

Here are some of the best southern-style put-downs that are effective if you are able to catch the gist:

• Bless her heart. This is one that most people have learned from "Designing Women" and other TV shows set in the South. It can mean anything from a true blessing to an opening for an insult. For example, "Bless her heart, she can't help it that her mama didn't teach her good manners."
• If you think … (turn it around). For example, if you've put on a few pounds after you last saw the person, she might say, "If you think you've lost weight recently, look behind you, and you'll find it."
• I'd ask you to do this, but it'll take up a lot of your time that I know you don't have. In other words, you don't trust the other person to follow through on whatever it is you want.
• At least you're happy. These words are often spoken by wealthy people to those not quite as "blessed." Or it can be said if the person disagrees with your choices.

• Isn't that just wonderful? In other words, it's anything but wonderful.
• Your baby just keeps gettin' cuter. This might sound good to someone who doesn't know better, but it's a way of saying your baby looked like a bigheaded, bald monster when she was a newborn.
• I so admire your stick-to-it-ness. You just won't let go of something, even when it's the stupidest idea ever.
• The two of you look so happy together. It's a good thing you found each other because no one else would want to be with either of you.
• Your mama must be so proud. You finally found something you couldn't mess up.
• Do go on. I'm so bored that if you keep on jabbering, I'll either fall asleep from tedium, or I'll have to excuse myself and find some drying paint for entertainment.
• You're entitled to your opinion. Not only do I disagree with you, but I think you're dumb as a bag of rocks.
• Good luck with that. Whatever you plan to do doesn't stand a chance of being successful.
• Thank you for sharing that. You just told me way more than I would ever want to know, and now every time I look at you, the visual will be more than I can handle. Don't count on seeing me again any time soon.
• You're so clever! The person making this comment doesn't think you're very smart.
• Thank you for the visit. I would have cleaned my house if I knew you were coming. I can't believe you didn't have the good manners to call before you rang my doorbell. Don't ever do that again, or I'll pretend I'm not home.
• That suits you. In other words, you're the only person it suits. For example, if you get a new haircut that gives you a helmet-head, someone might say, "That haircut suits you." In other words, you have tacky taste, and you're not likely to start any new trends with that style.
• What an interesting/brave/clever outfit. This is said when you wear several pieces in an outfit that comes across gaudy.
• Let me know how that turns out. What you just mentioned is a disaster waiting to happen.
• God love her. This is similar to "Bless her heart." You only say it to preface an insult. For example, "God love her, she's a few cards short of a full deck."
• How nice. This is what you say when someone crows about something that totally isn't worth bragging about.