How to Make Positive Thinking Work for You
Just like any other prolific reader of self-help books, you are most probably familiar with the principle of positive thinking.
And just like many self-help book addicts, you probably have practiced the many versions of positive thinking provided in self-help books but somehow, you have not realized spectacular results.
None of the likes preached by Norman Vincent Peale, Napoleon Hill, and the latest of which, Rhonda Byrnes of the The Secret fame.
The reason for this is not the principle of positive thinking itself but its oversimplification.
I have realized that knowing an oversimplified concept may almost be the same to not knowing the concept at all if in the process of oversimplification, one is lulled into complacency thinking that by merely knowing the principle or concept, things will start to work in his or her favor as if he or she possesses a magic wand.
I would like to write about how to make positive thinking work better for you by eliminating the following elements in your thinking which you are probably not aware of.
They are the ones responsible for your failure or lack of convincing results: Your confusion between a want and a need.
Although positive thinking works, it can best work when it is propelled by a strong desire.
Between a want and a need, a need will command a stronger desire than a mere want.
A need is something very essential for you, like a breath of fresh air when you are suffocating.
In contrast, a want is something you may want to have but really not essential for you, like a car, for example.
You will surely die if you are deprived of air but surely, there are a lot of ways going around without a car.
Ask yourself and answer honestly: have you been desiring something you only want or something you really need? The closer you can identify that object to a need, the greater your desire for it and therefore, the more fertile it will be for your positive thoughts to work and obtain it.
Your commitment to have it.
How strong is your commitment really in possibly having what you want or need? Commitment is not a mere mental assertion that you are committed.
I have seen people who express their commitment by stating aloud what they want to do coupled with a gesture of banging their fist on a table.
Is that real commitment? Real commitment is your complete or unequivocal willingness to endure, undergo or tackle anything that may crop up in connection with your effort to materialize a particular desire.
It is more of a mental process.
If there is even a minute thing that you may balk at doing in connection with the process of materializing your desire, then your desire will most probably not materialize.
It is like having a big machine.
No matter how big the machine is, if it lacks one small screw, the machine will falter and not work properly.
So does your commitment or lack of it.
Your own doubt that you will get it.
You may think that you are very positive.
But behind that aura of positivity, you are probably doubting, if not consciously, unconsciously.
How do you gauge that doubt? You can measure that doubt by observing yourself and monitoring that voice at the back of your mind that tells you repetitively that in spite of your efforts at positive thinking, you will probably fail in materializing your desire.
The more you hear of that inner voice, the more your doubt is, and the greater possibility that you will fail in materializing your desire.
You need to catch that voice and stop it until it stops pestering you.
Your own inability to relax while waiting for results.
After you have done what needs to be done, your ability to relax and simply wait for the result you are expecting is a measure of how much you trust the process you have put into motion.
When you tense yourself in anticipation, you are actually negating the whole process.
This is akin to doubting itself.
You become tense because at the back of your mind, you are thinking, what if it doesn't materialize at all? My suggestion is just to release everything, the way you trust that your oven will do the baking once you have put the mix you are baking inside, have turned the oven on, and have set the right temperature and timer.
Stop thinking about it.
All of the above refer to the inner and subjective mental state you should be having in materializing a desire.
It follows, of course, that at the physical level, you are doing what it takes through some behavioral actuation to obtain whatever it is that you would like to have or materialize.
Even if it is as close to you as a fruit hanging on a branch of a tree, you still need to stretch your hand to pick it.
And just like many self-help book addicts, you probably have practiced the many versions of positive thinking provided in self-help books but somehow, you have not realized spectacular results.
None of the likes preached by Norman Vincent Peale, Napoleon Hill, and the latest of which, Rhonda Byrnes of the The Secret fame.
The reason for this is not the principle of positive thinking itself but its oversimplification.
I have realized that knowing an oversimplified concept may almost be the same to not knowing the concept at all if in the process of oversimplification, one is lulled into complacency thinking that by merely knowing the principle or concept, things will start to work in his or her favor as if he or she possesses a magic wand.
I would like to write about how to make positive thinking work better for you by eliminating the following elements in your thinking which you are probably not aware of.
They are the ones responsible for your failure or lack of convincing results: Your confusion between a want and a need.
Although positive thinking works, it can best work when it is propelled by a strong desire.
Between a want and a need, a need will command a stronger desire than a mere want.
A need is something very essential for you, like a breath of fresh air when you are suffocating.
In contrast, a want is something you may want to have but really not essential for you, like a car, for example.
You will surely die if you are deprived of air but surely, there are a lot of ways going around without a car.
Ask yourself and answer honestly: have you been desiring something you only want or something you really need? The closer you can identify that object to a need, the greater your desire for it and therefore, the more fertile it will be for your positive thoughts to work and obtain it.
Your commitment to have it.
How strong is your commitment really in possibly having what you want or need? Commitment is not a mere mental assertion that you are committed.
I have seen people who express their commitment by stating aloud what they want to do coupled with a gesture of banging their fist on a table.
Is that real commitment? Real commitment is your complete or unequivocal willingness to endure, undergo or tackle anything that may crop up in connection with your effort to materialize a particular desire.
It is more of a mental process.
If there is even a minute thing that you may balk at doing in connection with the process of materializing your desire, then your desire will most probably not materialize.
It is like having a big machine.
No matter how big the machine is, if it lacks one small screw, the machine will falter and not work properly.
So does your commitment or lack of it.
Your own doubt that you will get it.
You may think that you are very positive.
But behind that aura of positivity, you are probably doubting, if not consciously, unconsciously.
How do you gauge that doubt? You can measure that doubt by observing yourself and monitoring that voice at the back of your mind that tells you repetitively that in spite of your efforts at positive thinking, you will probably fail in materializing your desire.
The more you hear of that inner voice, the more your doubt is, and the greater possibility that you will fail in materializing your desire.
You need to catch that voice and stop it until it stops pestering you.
Your own inability to relax while waiting for results.
After you have done what needs to be done, your ability to relax and simply wait for the result you are expecting is a measure of how much you trust the process you have put into motion.
When you tense yourself in anticipation, you are actually negating the whole process.
This is akin to doubting itself.
You become tense because at the back of your mind, you are thinking, what if it doesn't materialize at all? My suggestion is just to release everything, the way you trust that your oven will do the baking once you have put the mix you are baking inside, have turned the oven on, and have set the right temperature and timer.
Stop thinking about it.
All of the above refer to the inner and subjective mental state you should be having in materializing a desire.
It follows, of course, that at the physical level, you are doing what it takes through some behavioral actuation to obtain whatever it is that you would like to have or materialize.
Even if it is as close to you as a fruit hanging on a branch of a tree, you still need to stretch your hand to pick it.