Grandparents As Parents - The Interchangeable Terms
So what's all the fuss about? Sure: you're now a grandparent who has become a parent (for whatever reason).
Yet, does that really change the situation from what it was before.
Depends on which side of the fence your sandbox is sitting.
How you became the grandparent who is now the parent dictates what you must change about your interaction with your grandchild(ren).
If your grandchild(ren) are only used to visiting on weekends, how does the schedule change now that the relationship is now a 24/7/365? If your grandchild(ren) is old enough to be involved and understand this process, sit down and come up with a plan together.
If your grandchild(ren) is in daycare, is that going to change as it is, does the care need to be moved to a new location, or will you be taking over that role? If your grandchild(ren) is in elementary, middle, junior, or high school, does he/she need to transfer to a new school? What happens to all the extra things such as doctors, dentists, etc.
? Are they close enough to continue the same relationship or do you need to form brand new relationships from scratch? Are their social obligations - such as sport or other activities - that come into play? How will the grandchild(ren) get to these activities? Once you have all the technical things out of the way, what's the scoop on your new role? Initially, your grandchild(ren) may perceive you as "grandma" or "grandpa" with all the fun, reckless abandon, and free candy as before! (Good luck with that!) This is where you have to make some adjustments so that your grandchild(ren) understands that while things can be just as fantastic, there will be some slight tweaks.
First, discover what routine was in place before.
If you're lucky, maybe that same routine will work for you.
Chances are there will need to be some changes.
Give it a week or so and make notes of what adjustments you think are necessary.
Next, depending on the age of your grandchild(ren), either begin the changes (if the child is really too young to be involved in the decision making process), or sit down as a family and talk about how things needs some slight tweaks.
Try to make this something centered on change that is good - versus change that takes things away.
For example, perhaps your grandchild(ren) is used to eating ice cream just before going to bed.
Now, you know this does nothing but cause a cranky child in the morning.
Instead of eliminating this routine item all together, get creative.
Suggest that you'd like to move ice cream time up by a few hours so that that kid(s) will be able to add his or her own toppings.
This helps to smooth over the transition without making the change feel like a punishment or major life upheaval.
There's no difference between a grandparent and a parent - except maybe a few years and a couple of wrinkles.
Kids are still kids.
Just remember you'll probably be a different parent this time around since you're older and wiser! Grandparents custody rights carry the joy of children's laughter filling your home again.
Yet, does that really change the situation from what it was before.
Depends on which side of the fence your sandbox is sitting.
How you became the grandparent who is now the parent dictates what you must change about your interaction with your grandchild(ren).
If your grandchild(ren) are only used to visiting on weekends, how does the schedule change now that the relationship is now a 24/7/365? If your grandchild(ren) is old enough to be involved and understand this process, sit down and come up with a plan together.
If your grandchild(ren) is in daycare, is that going to change as it is, does the care need to be moved to a new location, or will you be taking over that role? If your grandchild(ren) is in elementary, middle, junior, or high school, does he/she need to transfer to a new school? What happens to all the extra things such as doctors, dentists, etc.
? Are they close enough to continue the same relationship or do you need to form brand new relationships from scratch? Are their social obligations - such as sport or other activities - that come into play? How will the grandchild(ren) get to these activities? Once you have all the technical things out of the way, what's the scoop on your new role? Initially, your grandchild(ren) may perceive you as "grandma" or "grandpa" with all the fun, reckless abandon, and free candy as before! (Good luck with that!) This is where you have to make some adjustments so that your grandchild(ren) understands that while things can be just as fantastic, there will be some slight tweaks.
First, discover what routine was in place before.
If you're lucky, maybe that same routine will work for you.
Chances are there will need to be some changes.
Give it a week or so and make notes of what adjustments you think are necessary.
Next, depending on the age of your grandchild(ren), either begin the changes (if the child is really too young to be involved in the decision making process), or sit down as a family and talk about how things needs some slight tweaks.
Try to make this something centered on change that is good - versus change that takes things away.
For example, perhaps your grandchild(ren) is used to eating ice cream just before going to bed.
Now, you know this does nothing but cause a cranky child in the morning.
Instead of eliminating this routine item all together, get creative.
Suggest that you'd like to move ice cream time up by a few hours so that that kid(s) will be able to add his or her own toppings.
This helps to smooth over the transition without making the change feel like a punishment or major life upheaval.
There's no difference between a grandparent and a parent - except maybe a few years and a couple of wrinkles.
Kids are still kids.
Just remember you'll probably be a different parent this time around since you're older and wiser! Grandparents custody rights carry the joy of children's laughter filling your home again.