The Impact of Chronic Arthritis on Family
Updated June 10, 2015.
It is very hard for parents to cope with the fact that their son or daughter has a disease. Besides feeling bad for the obvious reason that their child has a problem, the parent often feels somehow responsible. A parent may feel you inherited it from them or that they caused it. There are typically two different reactions that parents can have towards the disease. Parents who choose to deny the problem become the "ignorers".
They show less and less concern, ask fewer and fewer questions, and downplay the disease. In contrast, parents can choose to be overly-concerned. These parents feel total responsibility for you and feel the need to take care of you. They disregard the fact that you can take care of yourself. They become "smotherers".
The solution:
Try discussing the conflict and see if an understanding can be achieved where both the parent and child have their needs met. If parents are unwilling to change their attitude, concentrate on making yourself feel better.
Various emotions can be triggered between siblings when one sibling has a disease and the other is healthy. The sibling with the disease can sometimes feel jealousy, envy, or resentment towards the sibling who has been blessed with an easier life. The healthy sibling can feel jealousy too, for extra attention which is given to the unhealthy sibling. Pity towards the unhealthy sibling also can develop. By recognizing their differences and yet not understanding why circumstances are as they are, siblings may have to work through complex emotions.
The solution:
Everyone concerned must realize that things are a certain way, even if unexplainable. Once again, understanding and communication is critical. Siblings must accept the reality of the situation and allow each other to achieve all that is possible.
Source: Coping With Rheumatoid Arthritis, by Robert H. Phillips, Ph.D.
Parents
It is very hard for parents to cope with the fact that their son or daughter has a disease. Besides feeling bad for the obvious reason that their child has a problem, the parent often feels somehow responsible. A parent may feel you inherited it from them or that they caused it. There are typically two different reactions that parents can have towards the disease. Parents who choose to deny the problem become the "ignorers".
They show less and less concern, ask fewer and fewer questions, and downplay the disease. In contrast, parents can choose to be overly-concerned. These parents feel total responsibility for you and feel the need to take care of you. They disregard the fact that you can take care of yourself. They become "smotherers".
The solution:
Try discussing the conflict and see if an understanding can be achieved where both the parent and child have their needs met. If parents are unwilling to change their attitude, concentrate on making yourself feel better.
Siblings
Various emotions can be triggered between siblings when one sibling has a disease and the other is healthy. The sibling with the disease can sometimes feel jealousy, envy, or resentment towards the sibling who has been blessed with an easier life. The healthy sibling can feel jealousy too, for extra attention which is given to the unhealthy sibling. Pity towards the unhealthy sibling also can develop. By recognizing their differences and yet not understanding why circumstances are as they are, siblings may have to work through complex emotions.
The solution:
Everyone concerned must realize that things are a certain way, even if unexplainable. Once again, understanding and communication is critical. Siblings must accept the reality of the situation and allow each other to achieve all that is possible.
Source: Coping With Rheumatoid Arthritis, by Robert H. Phillips, Ph.D.