How Ethnic, Racial and Religious Differences can Influence Relationships
Ethnic, racial and religious differences are affecting increasing numbers of couples. Although social acceptance has increased, these differences can still cause a feeling of social rejection, alienation and isolation.
Social adaptability related to emotional conflicts and the need to hide emotions and certain psychological attitudes can also interfere with couple closeness and can be the primary burden influencing couples. These two groups tend to have more limited effect due to the fewer couples that may be influenced by them.
ETHNIC, RACIAL AND RELIGIOUS DIFFERENCES
In recent years the marriage of persons with different ethnic, racial and religious backgrounds has increased the potential of marital incompatibility. Interracial and interethnic marriages have become more common and accepted by the general populations. Nevertheless, bias and prejudice continue to exist and must be considered as a couple prepares to live together. Love and closeness often lessen the differences though no couple should avoid facing those issues that impinge on their lives.
To avoid conflicts in marriages where the couple does not share a single religion, the partners need to determine if they follow one or both religions. In general, following a single belief tends to bring greater stability in the marriage and enhances the family unity, including raising children.
The marked differences in religious ideology can cause disharmony. Some religions require long periods of study and confirmation before a convert is inducted into the religion. Others are less rigid in their demands. Couples should investigate these differences and obligations before marriage. Couples must also contend with the effect these differences will have on raising children.
Mixed racial, ethnic and religious couples need to clearly establish the guidelines for raising families.
SOCIAL ADAPTABILITY AND PERSONALITY CONFLICTS
Self-evaluation offers clues to our personalities. There are various ways people adapt to society. Many people are direct, forthright and consistent in their appearance and behavior. Others tend to disguise their real selves. We call these disguises façades, personas or alter-egos.
The need to hide emotions and ideas from others occurs when insecurity and feelings of inferiority are present. Creating and maintaining a successful façade offers a person a more peaceful way to exist in our society. The development of a façade usually happens without a person's awareness, but can be recognized by others. A loved one is often the person who first points out this adaptive method.
The ability to contain the feelings hidden behind a facade is often unsuccessful and unresolved feelings, such as anger and despair may be expressed. This often happens at home and played out with one's family. By self-scrutiny and recognizing these alternate selves one can begin to make the effort to overcome them and regain a consistent self.
In marriages, partners may have very different reasons to maintain these alter-selves. A mate who feels frightened of being rejected or fearful of anger or weighed down by guilt might deliberately change his personality to hide these reactions. Attempting to communicate when there is an inconsistency in one's personality tends to lead to considerable strife. It is essential to conquer this tendency and to be able to provide a reliable and constant self to one's partner.
Emotional differences can cause changes in self-esteem and become a major wall that separates partners. Also fear of arousing anger, alienation or rejection in a partner can create insuperable barriers that finally results in separation. As with all areas of incompatibility, individuals need to be ever vigilant and overcome these problems early and quickly.
Reaching the highest levels of love, intimacy, communication and sharing come from the building of understanding and trust. For in-depth suggestions, advice and methods to improve your relationship read "A Guide to Healthy Relationships."
Visit http://www.DrMarvinBerenson.com to review "A Guide to Healthy Relationships" and sign-up to receive Dr. Berenson's highly informative biweekly newsletter and two FREE gifts.
Marvin H. Berenson, M.D. is Clinical Professor Emeritus of Psychiatry,USCKeck School of Medicine, psychiatrist, lecturer, author and artist.
Social adaptability related to emotional conflicts and the need to hide emotions and certain psychological attitudes can also interfere with couple closeness and can be the primary burden influencing couples. These two groups tend to have more limited effect due to the fewer couples that may be influenced by them.
ETHNIC, RACIAL AND RELIGIOUS DIFFERENCES
In recent years the marriage of persons with different ethnic, racial and religious backgrounds has increased the potential of marital incompatibility. Interracial and interethnic marriages have become more common and accepted by the general populations. Nevertheless, bias and prejudice continue to exist and must be considered as a couple prepares to live together. Love and closeness often lessen the differences though no couple should avoid facing those issues that impinge on their lives.
To avoid conflicts in marriages where the couple does not share a single religion, the partners need to determine if they follow one or both religions. In general, following a single belief tends to bring greater stability in the marriage and enhances the family unity, including raising children.
The marked differences in religious ideology can cause disharmony. Some religions require long periods of study and confirmation before a convert is inducted into the religion. Others are less rigid in their demands. Couples should investigate these differences and obligations before marriage. Couples must also contend with the effect these differences will have on raising children.
Mixed racial, ethnic and religious couples need to clearly establish the guidelines for raising families.
SOCIAL ADAPTABILITY AND PERSONALITY CONFLICTS
Self-evaluation offers clues to our personalities. There are various ways people adapt to society. Many people are direct, forthright and consistent in their appearance and behavior. Others tend to disguise their real selves. We call these disguises façades, personas or alter-egos.
The need to hide emotions and ideas from others occurs when insecurity and feelings of inferiority are present. Creating and maintaining a successful façade offers a person a more peaceful way to exist in our society. The development of a façade usually happens without a person's awareness, but can be recognized by others. A loved one is often the person who first points out this adaptive method.
The ability to contain the feelings hidden behind a facade is often unsuccessful and unresolved feelings, such as anger and despair may be expressed. This often happens at home and played out with one's family. By self-scrutiny and recognizing these alternate selves one can begin to make the effort to overcome them and regain a consistent self.
In marriages, partners may have very different reasons to maintain these alter-selves. A mate who feels frightened of being rejected or fearful of anger or weighed down by guilt might deliberately change his personality to hide these reactions. Attempting to communicate when there is an inconsistency in one's personality tends to lead to considerable strife. It is essential to conquer this tendency and to be able to provide a reliable and constant self to one's partner.
Emotional differences can cause changes in self-esteem and become a major wall that separates partners. Also fear of arousing anger, alienation or rejection in a partner can create insuperable barriers that finally results in separation. As with all areas of incompatibility, individuals need to be ever vigilant and overcome these problems early and quickly.
Reaching the highest levels of love, intimacy, communication and sharing come from the building of understanding and trust. For in-depth suggestions, advice and methods to improve your relationship read "A Guide to Healthy Relationships."
Visit http://www.DrMarvinBerenson.com to review "A Guide to Healthy Relationships" and sign-up to receive Dr. Berenson's highly informative biweekly newsletter and two FREE gifts.
Marvin H. Berenson, M.D. is Clinical Professor Emeritus of Psychiatry,USCKeck School of Medicine, psychiatrist, lecturer, author and artist.